Thornfield Burning
It’s like a normal day at Thornfield, where I am working for my master called Mr. Rochester. He treats his servants very well and I am one of them. But the past weeks he has retired and has become very nervous. I think it’s because of his lover Mrs. Eyre. She ran away a month ago because Mr. Rochester’s wife, a mad woman, was hidden in the house. If Jane Eyre doesn’t come back he will get more and more depressed.
I get up at 6 ‘clock as usually and bring my master a cup of tea like every day and then do my work outdoors in the garden. I am cutting the shrubs, when I suddenly see flames coming out of the second floor. I run in to warn the other servants, Adele, a previous pupil of Jane Eyre, Mrs. Fairfax the manager of the house, and surely Mr. Rochester, but the fire is already raging in the 1st floor and at the top of the house. After a few minutes the heat has got unbearable and I go out to the others although I don’t know anything of my master, who is probably still in the house. Outside I see a strange woman on the roof, perhaps Mr. Rochester’s mad wife. What she is doing I ask myself. She runs to the end of the roof and jumps down, when she sees Mr. Rochester, who wants to save her. I can’t look at the woman or you better say what is left of her. Afterwards my master looses his bearings and faints a few seconds later. We take a ladder and bring him to the doctor as fast as possible, who saves his life, but can’t help his eyes, which are destroyed.
Finally I get fired, because Mr. Rochester only wants to have two servants with whom he lives in a house 30 miles away waiting for Jane Eyre.
1 Kommentar:
Stories are normally told in past tense.
exp: o'clock (1)
C? Adele is his daughter.
punctuation /exp: Mrs Fairfax, the housekeeper, ... (1)
exp: "surely" --> of course (1)
exp: on the first floor (1)
exp: "I don’t know anything of my master" (1) This doesn't quite mean what you think it means.
g: "What is she doing there?" I ask myself. (3)
sp: lose <--> loose (lose, nicht fixiert) (1)
exp: take him to the doctor
str: the doctor, who saves his life, as fast as possible --> the rel. pronoun must follow the noun that it belongs to (2)
punctuation: 30 miles away, waiting ...
Die Geschichte ist ok, aber du erstzählst ein bisschen nüchtern für eine Geschichte.
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